Keep it in the Bedroom: Part II

One comment from a reader was, "And the floodgates have opened" in response to the many postings, news stories and editorials concerning a certain Canadian Radio personality and his sexual practices.  As a blogger I strive to start discussion, raise debate and perhaps even provoke.  My main point in the article concerning Jian was my fear that our activities in the bedroom (between consensual and legal aged) partners is the cause for a loss of a career.  I am aware that Mr. Ghomeshi came "clean" so to speak and confided in his employers, was this their only solution for damage control?

The other people involved in this circus are the alleged victims, and in a truly democratic process, until proof is presented beyond a reasonable doubt, they are alleged, not confirmed.  I have read your comments, other responses by fellow writers out in the blogging community and on various online media outlets.  After digesting all of it this is what I want:

1.   I want women, if they are abused and not consenting to their partners sexual wishes or any type of mistreatment of any kind, to be brave and have the ability to report their abuse. (and be aware of the supports available to them).

2.  I want the democratic process to be alive and well in my country.   The media and the community at large have already "thrown" Jian under the bus, is it our right to do that?

3.  I want sexual freedom for practice among consenting adults, respecting each other's differences and needs.

4.   I want less judgement and more reflection from all of us on this planet.

My two cents, xo vagi

Keep It In The Bedroom

Radio Personality and Canadian King of pop culture and all things hip, Jian Ghomeshi won't be entertaining us with his smooth, sultry voice across the airwaves.   It appears that his idea of foreplay does not involve the typical romantic setting and massage oil, he gets it going with whips instead.  His sex life caused him to be fired by CBC.  This lends to some interesting debate.

As a woman and a feminist I do not condone the acts of dominance and violence between the sheets.  Do I think sex involves the loving glances and seemingly calm climaxes as we see on film?  No,  I prefer a good hearty bang over roses and chocolates - just no whips please.

Are my sexual preferences anyone's business? Certainly not.  The only people involved should be my partner and my girlfriends as we occasionally brag about a hot night over wine (yes, women talk sex and more freely then men among friends).  More than once we claim our orgasms the previous night were on the "Top Ten" list, or regale a fun weekend of hotel sex with our partners away from kids and life.

So poor Jian, his dirty laundry literally was very, very dirty.  Does that make him subject to a career in ruin, reputation marred and livelihood at risk?  Shouldn't we ask if he was a good person, did he care about his family, was he a respectful interviewer and host for all those years?    Does his appetite for deviant sex make him a villain or a victim?  And why now? If he has practiced his sexual life in this manner, why do his partners feel compelled to come forward to the public?  If he truly led them to his chamber of horror without any consent, why did they not charge him? 

I don't believe any employer has a right to invade your private parts, Jian's are on full display now.
The victim in this media circus is difficult to identify, however I would rather hold onto my rights for privacy in my bedroom.

Think about it, xo vagi.